Silence of Dinner

She had worked very very hard to gain her independence. She had worked hard to build her empire. She was on the verge of taking off in the online space. Her magazine interview was proof that she was about to go big. Things were finally going her way.

This was not the time to give up control and let a man dictate anything in her life. She was not going to throw all that marvelous education and flush it down the drain and be a housewife waiting for orders from a man.

She was not going to be barefoot and pregnant. She was not going to say “yes dear”. She was not going to call anyone “Daddy”. She was not owned. She was not a slave. She was not a doormat!

Her anger was filling her with rage. How dare hubby try to manipulate her into handing over all her hard earned success and just be some stupid mute. How dare he thing it was OK for her to just stop thinking! That was not his place! That was not his right!!

During the intercession, the gals all laughed and recounted all their favorite scenes. The loved the plot. They seemed to find it quite comical how women try to assert themselves as men. This made zero sense.

Assertiveness is not masculine. It is having your own voice and leaning in on your own destiny, she countered. There was no shame in women fighting for equal play and equal say.

She found it totally laughable that smart intelligent highly successful women like the ones she had so carefully curated and allowed in, would find this story line a good one. This was pure male chauvinistic ideals trying to prevent women from being their best version of themselves.

At the encouraging of the gals, she did eventually calm down and accept that it was just a play written by some dude. It was just his world view. It was not a script to tell her what to do with her own life. If she felt so moved as she was, then, it was because the writer and director had done a great job at conveying their views and it hit her well and got the response they wanted.

It was Bonita who added another angle that made everyone nod in approval and gave Boss Lady a curve she had not seen before. What if the play was written by a woman. A woman who was seeking her place in the male driven workforce. A woman who was trying to figure out what it means to be a woman in the dichotomy of modern life. A woman has to be a man at work and she also has to be this old fashioned woman at home.

What if the play was trying to get at the struggle many women face in the many roles they play. They have to be the linchpin that holds everything together. They have to be able to switch hats quickly and appeal to the judging eye of other women who are harsh on them for not being good at the switches. They have to appease the male gaze that wants a visual treat but is not always mature enough to handle that treat. They have to keep that male ego in check as it holds the keys to many jobs and opportunities still, yet they have to keep that ego in check so it doesn’t start to roar like it used to in ancient days.

This was making too much sense.

She was in a bit of a battle with herself. She had an amazing group of friends who loved her and supported her, yet she secretly competed with. She wanted to groom her man to be just as good as BFF’s man. She also was nervous about her second BFF (Bonita) who was single and seemed to have all identical physical assets, but was way better at using them to draw the male gaze.

Worse, hubby was surrounded by women who were prettier, sexier, hotter, and more sensual than she was. She didn’t trust them at all. She knew that if she didn’t stay on top of hubby, he’d soon wander. That is what men did. That’s what they were programmed to do. It was evolution. They had to sow their seeds. How could she compete with all these other younger models he had around him. Even second BFF was to be watched for. As loyal as she was, and as great a friend as she was, it was only a matter of time, or was it just paranoia?

How did her friends all manage to not feel the need to snoop. Why were they so confident their men would not wander off? How could they assure her that they didn’t check their men? They had to have had some way to do so and not get caught. That was it. Had to be it.

However, as much as she wanted to probe and figure this out, she was enjoying their company and they had eased her anger considerably. Time for the second act.