Life is filled with goal posts called milestones. We reach them, and sadly, rush to the next. Some of us are wise enough to celebrate the wins we have, no matter how small.

In the hierarchy of life, men tend to know where they stand compared to others. But, climbing the ranking order is a tricky proposition. What most men fear is the demotion of rank. We won’t focus on the climb today, there are other blogs more specialized in this endeavor.

With the goals of become a Dom…

I’ve gotten asked by several women and a few guys… can a man become a Dom when he’s not one now…

This is a tricky question. Not one that’s easy to answer. It is possible to be a man who has no idea of his dominant side. Then, such a man can wake up and realize that they’re a Dom.

Taking a man who has no Dom traits inside of him and making him one… far less likely to happen… if at all.

What is more practical and doable is leveling up one’s skills as a man. Becoming a better man is within reach and is honorable. If anything, women greatly respect a man who is working on fulfilling his potentials.

A woman can be patient with a man who is working on himself and actually making progress. It’s a sign of maturity that one is willing to improve on oneself and be a better person.

This Calendar Year

All men should have goals that they’re working on. Not just career goals. Not just scholarly goals. Personal development goals and social goals.

For the sake of this blog, there has to be relationship goals in the picture and bonding with one’s sub. Without such plans and goals, where is the relationship going and where are you developing yourself?

Keep in mind, most women are constantly changing and many of them for the better. If you’re staying stagnant, then you’re actually falling behind compared to the woman who trusts you to be her man. The very least, you’ve got to move forward enough to keep pace. Ideally, move forward enough to lead your lady to be her best self.

A practical example

This blog is planning to have regular posts for the Wolf Pack. This means a lot of work on the back end to make this the one home for all the wolves in the pack to hang out.

In addition to having a lot of content to create intentionally, there has to be room for the periodic responsive posts to news that the pack needs to know (not the stuff in the media). The blog has to have better content each and every passing month. This blog also has to listen to readers and understand what they’re looking for in order to produce what they want.

Then, the writer has to grow himself and better understand the world of BDSM. Sure, we’re wading in the shallows but some want to understand their depths a bit better. This blog has to be prepared to touch on the deep end and dive in every now and again.

It goes without saying, in our midst are several alpha women who have needs that should be considered. After all, what good is the pack if we can’t relate to the women who live within our ranks. They shed valuable light that has to be taken very seriously. Plus, what we do has an impact on them and vice versa.

Plus, there is other content to create outside the purview of the wolf pack. Writings that fans love and want more of.

All of this requires a steady growth on behalf of the writer who has to juggle his career, his family, his hobbies, other blogs, and keep this pack fed.

All of this didn’t start on day one. It’s been a steady evolution to build what could one day be a revolution. That’s how it is. Each year, men have to apply themselves to leveling up their skills as men.

Chivalry doesn’t have to die

As we level up, we become role models for those who see us. We may not be aware of their watchful eyes, but they are learning from us that it’s possible to level up. That’s how we keep chivalry alive.

We become better men and therefore better gentlemen. As we treat our subs better, others take note. Women will talk. Those women will talk to their men. The ripple effect can change the world for the better.

This pack is all about being the best gentlemen we can be and the expectation is everyone will do their part to reach that high standard.

What Can You Improve This Year?

Communication is the key to all relationships working. This blog won’t live long if there isn’t a steady clear consistent line of communication. It is asynchronous by nature but vital.

A Dom has to have time to communicate with his sub. He has to listen. Not with the intent of fixing something, but with the intent of understanding.

Most Doms don’t have advance communications degrees in the social sciences. While those would be very helpful, we’re not shooting for clinical level efficiencies. We just need Doms to be fully aware of the moment and listen actively to their subs.

This includes the verbal communications, the non-verbal communications, the in-between the lines communications, and the indirect communications that comes from other sources.

Other sources?

Yeah. Whatever her girlfriends may hint about the two of you. Whatever she may leave behind as a note somewhere. Whenever family make observations.

These other sources, in case one isn’t aware, has to be measured with a grain of salt. High levels of discernment and wisdom is necessary to know what information is valid and what information is relevant and pertinent.

By definition, most Doms have a plan for listening, supporting, encouraging, and learning about their subs. But, in the real world, not all Doms are created equal or competent.

Weekly moments to connect with your sub is vital. It could be in the form of a date, a sit down chit chat, or actively paying attention to her needs during play.

this blog is speaking from the assumption that most Dom/Sub relationships are also romantic in nature… which is not applicable to every Dom/Sub connections

Without weekly connecting monuments, misinformation can happen and create friction that could otherwise be avoided.